Life / Leadership Lessons from Prison

As I plow through the Bible in 2010, I hit Genesis 39-42 yesterday. This passage is about Joseph is prison after being falsely accused of hitting on Potiphar's wife, and his release from prison after Pharaoh finds out that he can interpret dreams. Some lessons that I think apply to leadership and life in general seemed to leap off the page at me. Rather than keeping them to myself, I thought I would share them in case one or two others of you can benefit:

Don't Let Circumstances Define You

Joseph was in prison. We are not told how long he was in there, but it's probably safe to assume it wasn't an overnight stay. He was put there after being a pretty important guy in Egypt. He could have let the experience sour him to life and embittered him toward God, but he didn't let that happen. He continued to follow after God and be faithful to him. We will experience hurts in life; while they will shape us, they don't have to define us.

Remember Who's Really In Charge

After Pharaoh heard about Joseph's ability to interpret dreams, he pulled him out of prison because he had been having some strange dreams. When he asked Joseph to interpret them, his reply was that he couldn't do it, but that God would. No matter how talented or gifted you are in your area of ministry, expertise, or leadership, stay humble and remember that the only reason you are that way is because God graced you to be.

Always Speak The Truth (Even If No One Wants To Hear It)

Joseph shared his time in prison with two other guys: a cupbearer and a baker. They each had weird dreams that they asked Joseph to interpret. The cupbearer's dream was a favorable dream, and Joseph told him so. The interpretation of the baker's dream was not so favorable: the interpretation meant death for him. Joseph did not try to sugarcoat the interpretation; he simply told him the truth. Sometimes its tempting to try to only make the people we work with, for, or over feel good and happy - because we don't want to offend or hurt anyone - when oftentimes, what they really need to hear is the truth, even if it hurts.

When God Opens a Door, Walk Right Through It

After Joseph gives the interpretation of Pharaoh's dream to him, which involved seven years of plenty followed by seven years of famine, he kept talking and told Pharaoh what he should do about it. Pharaoh didn't ask for his opinion, but he gave it anyway. As a result, Egypt - and more importantly, Joseph's family, which would ultimately produce Jesus - were saved. There are situations in life when people will not ask our opinion, even though we may be able to see things more clearly than others do. Don't be afraid to open your mouth and share your opinion. It may be just what we need to hear.

Those are my thoughts. What are yours?

'Primal' by Mark Batterson

A while back I thought I might write a book (who am I kidding, right?). The theme for my imaginary book was, 'Getting Back to Basics,' with the idea being, when you boil down Christianity to its most basic of elements, what are you left with. Now, with Mark Batterson's latest book, Primal, I see I don't have to write it because he has completed my vision. And instead of having to go through the ordeal of actually writing it, I simply got to experience the joy of reading it.

In Primal, Batterson tackles the heart of the Gospel boiled down to one commandment: Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. Only he defines each as compassion (heart), wonder (soul), curiosity (mind), and power (strength). In each section he discusses what each might look like if we truly love God with that particular aspect of our being. And let me just say, it is a very challenging and inspiring read. As I read each section, I was inspired to love God more than I do currently, but also challenged as it isn't always an easy task.

Batterson is one of those authors who clearly reads and studies quite a bit and draws from his studies to build his discussions. His scientific background shows through, but not in a way that is boring or over one's head (this coming from someone who doesn't really care for science all that much). The information he details is very enlightening, interesting, and effective in making his points more clear.

Primal is another in a growing list of great books from Mark Batterson (his others being In a Pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day and Wild Goose Chase). I hope there are lots more to come. It just hit the shelves today. I would strongly encourage picking up a copy and making it the first book you read in 2010. You can pick up a copy from RandomHouse.com.

Fantasy Football 2009

OK, so I haven't posted in...forever. It's time to correct that with my draft for the 2009 Fantasy Football season:

• Andre Johnson - WR
• Anquan Boldin - WR
• Steve Slaton - RB
• Pierre Thomas - RB
• Minnesota - Def
• Marshawn Lynch - RB
• John Carlson - TE
• Matt Hasselbeck - QB
• Lavernues Coles - WR
• Derrick Ward - RB
• James Davis - RB (Sleeper)
• Nate Kaeding - PK
• Tom Brady - QB (Keeper)

Let me know your thoughts...

The Logo

I heard on ESPN Radio this morning that Jerry West - a.k.a., "The Logo" - has come out and said that the NBA logo should be redone using the silhouette of Michael Jordan instead of himself. Pretty humble, if you ask me. This started a discussion on the radio, "Who should be the logo for the various major sports?" This is in a similar vein to the sports Mount Rushmore. Not that anyone cares, here would be my major sports logo suggestions:

• NBA: Michael Jordan - He is arguably the best who has ever played the game and would be recognizable as a silhouette. The problem would be that his silhouette is already being used by his Air Jordan line.
• MLB: Willie Mays - I never really saw him play, but many consider him to be the best who ever played. Babe Ruth would just be too fat for a logo.
• NFL: Jim Brown - They were tossing around the name Roger Staubach on the radio. Really?! Jim Brown clearly was the best running back who has ever played, and arguable the best player period. If he had played longer - only nine seasons in his career - he would have put the rushing record so out of reach it would be laughable, even though they played fewer games per season than they do now.
• NHL: Wayne Gretzky - Is there seriously anyone else in contention?

Your thoughts?

The Truth About You by Marcus Buckingham

Wouldn't it be great if the majority of the time we spend at work was spent doing things that energize us, and not sap us, to the point of truly looking forward to going to work? In Marcus Buckingham's book, The Truth About You, he addresses this very question. In this interactive work (there is a DVD and a Strengths / Weaknesses journal), Buckingham addresses many of the same arguments that he has in his other works: it's a myth that you should try to develop your weaknesses, strengths are not what you are good at but what you draw energy from, and you employer did not hire you for who you are, but what you can do for them, to name a few. Also, he gives practical ways to help discover your strengths without taking the test, as well as practical tips to help design your job around your strengths.

This is a great book! I love everything I've read of his. What made this stand out was, 1) how interactive it is, 2) how quick/easy of a read it is, and 3) how practical it is. The thing I have missed from his other books is how to take your strengths and actually apply them in your present job. That is not missing from this one. I would highly recommend this book to anyone who has a job since, if what he writes is put into practice, your job will become a more fulfilling place.

More Gratuitous Children Video

Not only can Hanna now walk - she can also dance! Colin's not so bad, either...

Three Funny Colin Stories

I'll have a venti Buckeye leaf, please...
During the football season, I successfully indoctrinated Colin to root for The Ohio State University Buckeyes. I trained him to say, "Go Bucks!" and "Go Buckeyes!" (which sometimes comes out Buxeyes) However, he is not really good at discriminating between teams, so if he sees any team playing football, he proclaims, "Go Bucks!" That's OK with me. Then the other day, we were at the mall checking out the kiosk that had the calendars on super-sale. We paused by the sports calendars, and he saw a football calendar and shouted, "Go Starbucks!" I cracked up, as did the kiosk employee. At least he confused it with something else I am very fond of. Now, when he wants to write something, he goes to the drawer to get his Starbucks (really, Buckeyes) pen.

Naked Boy
The other night, as I always do, I finished up getting ready for bed in the bathroom and ventured into the kids' room to cover them up and kiss them good-night. When I got to Colin's bed, I noticed something on the floor. Without my glasses on and with the lights off, it took me a moment to realize that it was Colin's pajamas and pull-up. I looked up and, although he was covered up, I could tell he was naked under the covers. I went into our bedroom, where Marcy was smiling since she had already witnessed this, and said, "Man, is he going to be cold!" Marcy insisted that we get him dressed, so she did. She came to bed and we talked for a while. She then got up to go check on him, came back to our room and informed me that he was naked again, under the covers, and smiling at her. I was told that I had to deal with this. I went into his room and, trying desperately not to smile or laugh, got him dressed and told him that if took off his jammies again, he would have to go to time-out. I came back to bed. A short while later, Marcy went to check on him again and again, he was naked. She got him up and took him to the cold, dark dining room to sit in time-out...naked. I'm sure if social services had walked in right then we would have some 'splainin to do. It continues to be a constant struggle, including bare-bottom spankings, but it also continues to be hilarious. On Friday, during his naptime, I met him at his bedroom door - when he was supposed to be sleeping - and told him that he was getting a spanking. He ran to his bed, curled up in a ball on his face, and grabbed his butt-cheeks with his hands. What a sight!

You're Not Allowed to Play with Slingshots, Colin...
The other day, we were at our wits end. All of our normal babysitters were unavailable to watch the kids for our leadership retreat on Saturday. At The Porch, Marcy asked one of our pastor's teenage sons if he could babysit (he volunteers in the nursery on the weekend, so it wasn't as out of left field as it might seem), and he said he could. So on Saturday morning, Marcy told Colin that he was going to the church to play with David. Colin's eyes got real big as he got excited and asked, "And Goliath, too?" I guess he's been listening when we've read to him out of his Bible storybook after all.

Hanna's Walking

Isn't It Ironic, Don't Ya' Think?

Being the rabid Cleveland Browns fan that I am, this football season has been a major disappointment. I never bought into the preseason hype that the Browns were Super Bowl contenders after a 10-6 season last year, but I never thought they would be this bad. I picked them to hover around the .500 mark. Not likely now. Over at Cleveland.com, there are an interesting couple of articles that attempt to assess blame and come up with solutions. There are too many problems to narrow it down to just one thing. The incredible drop-off of Pro Bowl players from a year ago. The remarkable inability of the defense to tackle. The horrible clock-management and lack of creativity on the part of Romeo Crennel and staff (with the exception of the win against the Giants on Monday Night Football earlier this year). Derek Anderson going from stud to dud in the same amount of time he traveled the other direction. I agree with Terry Pluto that I don't think Savage is the problem. He writes: "Despite this dismal 4-8 season, the Browns do have better players than when Savage took over four years ago." But one thing is for sure: Braylon Edwards' inability to catch the ball - what wide receivers are paid to do - hasn't helped. He has, what, 17 drops on the season? Ridiculous! It made me remember this ad for fantasy football that aired a couple of years ago. Isn't it ironic?



Maybe he needs to play blindfolded...

What's Been Going On?

That's a fine question. There has been a lot going on lately. Novembers are usually pretty full in my world. They usually include a youth fall retreat, the National Youth Workers Convention, and often a trip home to Ohio for Thanksgiving. Some of those things still happened this year, but my November looked much different than I expected.

A couple of weekends ago, we did have our youth fall retreat at Logan Valley Christian Retreat in Ellington, MO. It was a great weekend! We had over 60 students attend and they all seemed to have a good time and take something away from the weekend. The highlight for me was to observe as the students went through the prayer labyrinth that we set up. It seemed that each student connected with a different part of the labyrinth and God met them each in a different way. We could have just done the labyrinth and it would have been a great weekend. But we did a lot of other stuff, too. Overall, a really good weekend.

The following weekend I was supposed to attend the NYWC with some of my volunteers in the youth ministry. However, the night before we were supposed to leave (Thursday night), Hanna got sick and we had to take her to the ER. It took a couple of days for the test results to come back, but it turns out that she had a urinary tract infection. In the meantime, I woke up on Friday morning at 3:00am with a horrible headache. No medicine helped the pain to go away. I was hoping to feel better and meet my volunteers in Nashville for the convention, but it never went away. Because of the pain, I couldn't eat or sleep and started vomiting that evening. Finally, after 25 hours of misery, at 4:00am on Saturday morning, I took myself to the ER. They performed a CAT scan on me and did a spinal tap and admitted me to the hospital. They figured that I had meningitis of some sort, either bacterial (the bad one, which can result in brain damage or death) or viral (mostly just annoying and painful), but they needed me to stay until the tests came back. The finally came back and confirmed that I did have viral meningitis. I was discharged on Monday with a regimen of pain meds (yeah, I missed the whole convention), which I have been taking ever since. Most of Thanksgiving week was spent in pain or a drug-induced fog. Fortunately, Marcy's mom and stepdad came into town for Thanksgiving. hey provided a lot of help with the kids so I didn't have to worry about Marcy having to do too much with me being laid up. They were already planning on coming for the holiday, so it worked out pretty well in the long run. I started back to work some this week, so I think it is soon to be behind me. Viral meningitis is always one of those things you hear about, but you never know anyone that had had it. I guess I can't say that anymore.

So, November was a little different for me. And now, I just got a call from Marcy who told me that Hanna has to go to the hospital on Monday to get checked out after her urinary tract infection. That's great, because we haven't spent enough time there lately. Pray for her, please.

The Pope and Rolex

I just read an interesting article linked to by an e-mail I get from Neue Ministry. It compared the effects that consumer branding - particularly the Mac brand - and religion has on a person's brain. The author raises a tough question: If brands have become religions (which it appears that they have, in some cases - watch the 2nd video in the article), have religions been reduced to brands? If they have, I wonder what brand my religion / church has become, or yours?

Perhaps the bigger question is: Is Steve Jobs deity? (note: that was totally tongue-in-cheek; don't send me hate comments)

Dirty Jobs: The Early Years

If you enjoy Mike Rowe from Dirty Jobs, you will love this video from earlier in his career when he was on QVC. I ran across it on the YS Blog. Enjoy!

Trick-or-Treating vs. Community

Yesterday marked my favorite holiday of the whole year: Halloween. I know, a good Christian's favorite holiday should either be Christmas or Easter, what with the significance of each. And I do agree that each of those are far more important, but as far as which holiday gets me the most excited based on the modern-day celebration of each, Halloween wins out. And now that I have kids, it is even more pronounced. I get totally jazzed about the idea of trick-or-treating with them and picking out costumes. This year I was determined that Colin would be Curious George, and on Sunday I was able to find a costume for only $10.00. Major score, and he was majorly cute! And last night to celebrate, we ventured to a local church that held a Tractor Treat, complete with games, prizes, free photos, hay rides, and of course plenty of candy. Colin had a blast, which meant that so did Daddy!

On my way home, I drove past what can be described as a well-to-do neighborhood. If I had to go visit a friend in that neighborhood last night, I would have been out of luck as the streets were completely lined with cars from visiting neighborhoods. I wondered, "What has happened to trick-or-treat?" 

Trick-or-treat used to be an opportunity to get together with all your friends from your neighborhood, compare costumes, and ransack our neighbors for candy. Sure, the goal was always candy and to have the best costume, but there was also a community element to the whole event. We couldn't have verbalized it that way as kids, but there was something fun about going around to all of your neighbors that you see every day and have them make comments about your costume. There was even one old guy that wore a different mask every year. One year, he wore the mask of a young, hot lady and he talked in a high voice. I still remember that now, thirty years later. I was sad when I had heard that he had passed away some years ago because he was a part of the community. He was my neighbor.

Today, trick-or-treat is nothing more than hitting up perfect strangers for candy, oftentimes strangers who live on the complete opposite side of town. You stake out the various neighborhoods to try to determine which one is the nicest. Then once you have determined that, you have to decide if they will be the most generous, and if not, you choose the next most prosperous area, or the next. And if your bag is not so full that you can't carry it anymore, the night has not been successful. And it doesn't matter if you don't have a costume; you can still go. I have had kids come to my door in the past with no costume at all, simply dressed in their normal street clothes, with their bags out expecting candy. The bottom line is, the one with the most candy wins. It's basically begging on really nice streets.

What happened to the community aspect? It doesn't matter if you don't get together with your friends. Who cares if you don't see your neighbors or trick-or-treat in your own neighborhood? What matters is the candy. That's all. Some could argue that I did the exact same thing by taking my son to a local church instead of going around my own neighborhood. That's somewhat fair, but he's also only 2 1/2 years old, and I thought the community that a church might provide might be preferable to a child that age than the normal Halloween environment. Perhaps I violated my own argument, but that would just defend it - that the community element to Halloween is going, if not already, gone. That it doesn't matter if your neighbors ever see you that night, or if you see them. When that crazy old guy in the neighborhood passes away, who will care? Possibly no one in the neighborhood because the community has evaporated. And I would suggest that it is just a reflection in society as a whole. Just my two cents' worth....

Four Unrelated Stories

Technically, two of the stories are closely related, as they involve Colin praying. And if you want to get even more technical, they are all related in that they are all things I have experienced. But on the surface of things, these are simply a few stories and musings from the past couple of weeks. I think I'll start with the two fairly related stories.

A little over a week ago, my dad was in town. Since there is not very much to do in The Cape (as my cousin-in-law likes to call it), we ventured to St. Louis to take the kids to the zoo. It was quite fun watching Colin get all excited about seeing the various animals, especially since he is now at an age where he can actually name many of them. While we walked through the African section, we saw many horned animals. Colin didn't recognize any of them, so he asked, "What's that?" quite frequently. My standard answer - because I didn't know much of the time - was, "It's a yak." I think I was the only one who was entertained by my response. Later that night, we were all pretty exhausted. As I was tucking Colin into bed, we prayed together as we do every night. I prayed and thanked God for all of the animals that He created that we saw that day, for the elephants, and the giraffes, and the tigers, and then Colin piped in with, "and the yaks!" That's right, Colin, and the yaks. Maybe I wasn't the only one paying attention to my responses.

This past Saturday, we took some of our students rock climbing at Giant City State Park in Makanda, IL. We had a gorgeous day, and 20 of our students participated in climbing any one of three different climbs and rappelling off of the 120 ft. cliff. After a while, some of the students started asking if I was going to climb. So I geared up knowing full well that this was not going to go well. I am in pretty miserable physical condition, and I know how weak I have allowed myself to get. The last time I rock climbed, it was on a man-made wall, and I made it about 2/3 of the way up the wall before I had to quit. This time would probably be worse. So I started up the medium climb. After a short time, one of our freshman girls blew past me on the difficult climb. Dang! But I kept going. From below, my belayer and Barry - one of our SIMYs who was also belaying - were shouting instructions up to me. All of the verbal encouragement in the world wouldn't have gotten me to the top, but the coaching was sure helping. Not too much later, another student caught up to me on the difficult climb. Dang! But he didn't pass me. I finally, after a really long time, made it to the top. WOO-HOO!!! I beat it! I seriously would have quit early on without the strong and informed coaching that I received from down below. I wondered later that day: How much better could I be doing in life in general if I had a 'coach'? A mentor who could walk me through the difficult times when I don't know where to turn next. Something to consider. (BTW, you can see pictures of our day at our Flickr site)

On Monday night, I was freezing at a soccer game at CHS. My phone rang around our normal dinnertime. Marcy was calling to tell me a story. Every night that I am home, we pray before eating dinner (or any meal, for that matter). Sometimes we let Colin pray, but usually have to help him. "God is great, God is good, let us thank Him for our food. Amen!" He does a pretty good job with this prayer. This night, I was not there to pray with them, so as Marcy prayed for the meal, Colin indicated that he wanted to pray for Daddy (that's me). So Marcy told him to go ahead and pray for Daddy. This is what he prayed: "God is great, for Daddy. Amen!" That's my boy!

I received an e-mail a couple of weeks ago from our Executive Director telling me - and a couple of the other pastors - that we needed to plan on attending the Staff-Parish meeting scheduled for Oct. 28th (last night). We needed to prepare a report detailing our job responsibilities. This seemed odd, since they are the group hat controls our jobs; I figured they knew what we did. Well, I knew Marcy would be out of town (in Seattle visiting her sister and her new baby), so I inquired how long to expect to be in the meeting so I could get a babysitter. I was told that I could go ahead and bring Colin to the meeting. Again, this seemed odd, to bring your child to a Staff-Parish meeting, but whatever. So after dinner at Culver's, Colin and I headed up to the church. One of our former students was there, so she volunteered to watch Colin while I had my meeting. I went in along with the other pastors. After a prayer, the head of the committee informed us that it was Pastor Appreciation Month, and that they had gifts for us. They brought in a duffel bag for each of us that represented our favorite teams: the Browns for me, the Pacers for another, the Sooners for another, the Seminoles for yet another, and the Cardinals for our senior pastor. It was explained to us that the small groups in the church had all gone together to shower us with appreciation. Inside my bag, I found a huge stack of cards from all sorts of people at the church, some of whom I know, some not so much. Also inside was some men's skin care products and a candle from Bed, Bath & Beyond, a t-shirt from Steve & Barry's, and numerous gift cards from Barnes & Noble, Outback, Panera, and Mollie's, just to name a few. WOW! I'm not sure that I have ever felt more appreciated in my life! Needless to say, I went to bed on cloud nine. Thanks, people of La Croix! It's good to serve with you..

Black Eye

I never thought my first black eye would come at the hands - so to speak - of my 2 1/2 year-old...

On Friday night, Colin started playing a fun game with Hanna, who was sitting on my lap. Hanna would reach out and touch Colin's face. In response, Colin would let out a loud yell and fall down like he had just been hit. Over and over again he did this as Hanna and I just laughed. The next morning, Hanna joined Marcy and I in bed after she ate. A short while later, Colin woke up and climbed up with us, too. Colin, remembering the fun that was had the previous night, started playing the game again, with Hanna touching his face, and him flopping down into our pillows. Except that one fateful time, Colin decided to flop backwards. The back of his head crashed down onto my eyebrow, causing a significant amount of pain and the present bruising that you see above. It made for a good story at church this morning. I'm sure that this is just the first of many Daddy-hood scars that I will incur in my lifetime.

Is This Product Necessary?

I was looking at the YS blog this morning and came across a link for this product. It is the GoateeSaver, a guide that helps you shave the perfect goatee. Seriously now, is this product necessary?! Maybe my goatee is a little asymmetrical, but I'm not about to shell out $19.99 for the opportunity to make it perfect, all the while looking really silly. The sad part is that there are people that will pay the money and whoever it is that invented this will make some good money from it. Maybe I should copme up with some random, unnecessary product so I can make a little extra spending cash.

Technical Problems

The first couple of times I saw Obama and McCain speak I thought, "If we are voting on oratory skills, Obama will destroy McCain." And I've thought that until I saw this video. Obama's teleprompter goes down and here's what happens...



Breathalyzer = Classic!

Fantasy Football '08

It's that time of year again, when I reveal who I drafted in our church fantasy football league. Going into the draft, I had a difficult decision to make. I had to decide who was going to be my keeper. I had it boiled down to either Earnest Graham (RB - Saints) or Brandon Marshall (WR - Broncos). Both of them were free agent pick-ups, which meant that I would only have to sacrifice my last-round draft pick from this year's draft to keep either. They were each rated at about the same place on the big draft boards I read online, so it was a crap shoot. After much deliberation - and some help from my friend Brian - I chose to keep Marshall. Also, I realized that I started the night with the #5 pick (out of ten teams), which is not a desirable location. One pick earlier and I could have gotten one of the true stud RBs, but instead I got a tier three guy. But Portis has been nice for me in the past, so we'll hold off on the judgment calls until then. Now, without any further ado, here is my draft, in order:

• Clinton Portis - RB (pictured here)
  
• Andre Johnson - WR
• Brandon Jacobs - RB
• Derek Anderson - QB (also, if he loses the job to Quinn, or gets injured, I still keep the Browns' QB)
• Calvin Johnson - WR
• Fred Taylor - RB
• Heath Miller - TE
• Seattle - Defense
• Anthony Gonzalez - WR
• Kevin Smith - RB
• Chester Taylor - RB (this was a block so the guy who had Adrian Peterson couldn't handcuff his pick in case AD gets injured - hee-hee!)
• Nate Kaeding - K
• Brandon Marshall - WR

The first game is Thursday night - Are you ready for some football?!

The Thirties

I just had my last birthday in my 30's the other day. It allowed me to reflect on the last decade of my life, and wonder what the next year might bring. In my 30's, I:

• Went to seminary
• Graduated from seminary
• Met, fell in love with, and married my lovely wife
• Started a career in full-time youth ministry
• Moved west of the Mississippi River
• Bought a house
  
• Got a dog
• Had the two most awesome children in the whole, entire world

It's been a great decade! The 40's will be hard-pressed to beat it...but I still have a whole year before I have to think about that.

Hanna Giggling

Here is our beautiful daughter with her first giggles. Seriously cute!